Thursday, March 6, 2014

New Book Announced, New Short Story Published, New Interview...Interviewed?

How goes it, Dangerlings?

Man, it's been a busy few weeks for me. Writing-wise, at least. And I haven't updated this blog thingeroo so I'm cramming it all into one information-packed post. THE POST YOU'RE READING RIGHT NOW! Let me quit jabbering and start with the news:

One
I HAVE A NEW BOOK COMING OUT SOON AND HERE IS YOUR FIRST LOOK AT THE FUCKING COVER:


Here's the info on that so far:
1. It's called Stranger Danger.
2. It contains two novellas, one by Kevin Strange and one from myself (hence the title).
3. My novella is called Roadvolution, and it's fucking awesome.
4. It's coming out through Strangehouse Books.
5. It'll be released in late-April/early-May. No exact date yet, but stay tuned for details.

Two
Since we're on the subject of Stranger Danger, this past Saturday Kevin and I did a live drunken AMA on youtube, hosted by the one and only Fabulous Raye. It was a total shitshow. I was drunk before we started and hammered by the end. But if you want more info on Stranger Danger, or are a masochist, you can view all two hours of that nonsense right here:


Three
I have a new short story out! And it's free on the interwebs for you to read. It's called THEY CALL HIM BIGFOOT AVERT YOUR EYES NO AUTOGRAPHS PLEASE. You can find that at my all-time favorite online lit-mag Jersey Devil Press. I had submitted that story for a special issue for JDP founder Eirik Gumeny who is currently awaiting a lung transplant. It's sort of a benefit issue, not only to honor Eirik himself, but to help raise the funds he needs to pay for the operation and the aftercare. So, if you're the type of person who wants to help out a good friend and great writer, consider donating HERE to his COTA fundraiser. Seriously. Give. I'm not saying hand him your first born, but every little bit helps.

[Speaking of Eirik, he's got a new book out too! The THIRD novel in his hilariously inappropriate Exponential Apocalypse series, called HIGH VOLTAGE. You'd be a dumb dummy if you don't pick up a copy of this motherfucker's book this very instant!]

OKAY - that's about it, I think. A lot of info thrown at you and I don't feel like recapping it all, so if you do want a recap, just scroll back up to the top of this page and read the post all over again. Just click on all the links I dropped, okay? That's what's important here.

Anyway, Dangerlings, thank you, as always, for reading. I love each and every one of you more than you know.

Danger!

Monday, January 6, 2014

Two New Anthologies For Your Book Lovin' Ass!

Let's get down to brass tacks here, people:

TWO GODDAMN NEW ANTHOLOGIES PUBLISHED AND YOU'RE GONNA NEED TO CHECK THIS SHIT OUT!!

First up, my story "My Tapir" has been published in the fourth edition of Rooster Republic Press's flagship anthology Tall Tales with Short Cocks.

Here's the cover art (inspired by my lowly words):


Kinda honored about that. Again, here's a link to buy it on Amazon! BUY IT RIGHT NOW, SUCKA! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! IT'S AWESOME!

SECONDLY, I have a story called "The Monster, the Man, the Building, the Bomb" in Bizarro Pulp Press's first anthology Bizarro, Bizarro.

Buy that shit right here!

OVER 500 PAGES of strangeness for your undeserving eyeballs. Seriously, people, check out the table of contents. I'm in great company here. An honor to be included in such a fine publication.

So here's the links again:

TALL TALES WITH SHORT COCKS VOL. 4

BIZARRO, BIZARRO

Man, I'm kill it over here!

~ Danger

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

I'm On Crack! Er --- I mean, A PODCAST!

Yeah, ignore that title. I'm not on crack. Unless you got some....

My segment with The Surreal Grotesque Podcast just went up. And it's a grand ol' time, if I do say so myself, which I suppose I just said, so that's kind of redundant. ANYWAY, this is a wonderful podcast with lots of interesting bizarro authors so CHECK IT OUT:

Listen or Download Here

Let the smooth sounds of my voice satisfy your ear pussies.

And a BIG thank you to Jeremy Maddux for having me on the show. That dude deserves a medal or something for doing what he does. I'd give him one, but I'm a fuckin' author. I don't have any money.

Enjoy kiddos.

~ Danger!

Saturday, December 7, 2013

JUNK Baby!

My Dearest Danger Lovers ~

Get your ass over to Amazon right now and pick up JUNK, a little ebook collection of fucked-up, funny stories INCLUDING one by your favorite author in the known universe, ME!

My contribution is called PROM NIGHT. It takes place on prom night. And things go somewhat wrong for ugly teenager Penny Wilkinson, who's date has stood her up. As she suffers through the 5 stages of grief, things start to get weird. Like, weird weird. Read it and find out.

Seriously, dude. The ebook costs ninety-nine fucking cents. And you get 8 stories. This isn't about making money for us. It's about giving you some funny fucking fiction. Go buy a copy, fool!

JUNK

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming, already in progress.

~ Danger!

Monday, August 12, 2013

Books, Beer and Bullshit Podcast Interview!

Greeting out there in Internetland!

I'm pleased to let you all know that my interview with the Books, Beer and Bullshit Podcast just went up! In addition to DangerRAMA, come listen to us discuss the lighter side of fast food franchising, Norwegian nomenclature and having sex with your own body parts.

This is a consistently hilarious show and I'm really, really glad they invited me to be a part of it.

LISTEN HERE WITH YOUR EARHOLES, SUCKAS!

And follow BB&B here and on Facebook.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming,

Danger!

Sunday, July 7, 2013

DangerRAMA is OUT NOW!!!

That's right, kiddos!

My new book DangerRAMA is officially out and available for your purchasing pleasure! Three silly-ass novellas that are guaranteed to make you laugh, cry, vomit, lactate, become smarter and better looking, contemplate life, grow 6 inches taller, and secrete a foul-smelling honey-like substance from you ears, nose and MORE!

Here are the relevant links:

Paperback

Kindle

Here's how you can win an autographed copy along with a refrigerator-art style drawing by ME!

And here's the release event page on Facebook, in case you want to help spread the word in much the same manner this novel will invariably spread your butt (with pleasure).

Thanks 10000% to Rooster Republic Press for putting out this book. And thank you, person reading this, because you're clicking on over to Amazon right now and buying a copy, AREN'T YOU?

~ Danger

Thursday, June 20, 2013

DangerRAMA! Coming Soon!


There's the cover art (front and back) of my soonforthupcoming book DangerRAMA!

In case you can't read the back cover here's what it says:

Ladies and gentleworms, gargoyles and girls – do you have the mettle to step up and peer into the mouth of mayhem, incongruity, shock and perversion? A trio of taint-tingling tales await you between these covers. Your taint will tingle. On your taint. The taint is that area between your balls and asshole, in case you didn’t know. Is it tingling yet? Good. Now let these three twisted novellas forever change your pathetic little life:

KNIGHTS OF THE WHITE CASTLE – An inter-dimensional tale of hamburgers, hubris and science gone mad!

SOMNAMBULANT – Terrorists, movie stars, and blue whales converge in this story about a dude who’s really just trying to get a good night’s sleep.

ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME – A computer malfunction sends a lone astronaut spiraling across the cosmos. Will he save mankind or just masturbate a lot?

That's right. Three new novellas in one nice little package! There is not an "official" release date as of right now, but this book will be available SOON. Sooner than you think. Like, in a week or two. Or three. Who knows. Point is - SOON MUTHAFUCKA! In the meantime here's what you can do to stay informed:

Add DangerRAMA on Goodreads by clicking this link

Visit Rooster Republic Press by clicking this link

Read an interview I did concerning DangerRAMA a few months back with this link

Feel free to 'add' me on Facebook by clicking here 

I'm really excited and very proud of this book and I can't wait for you fine folks out there in internetland to read it.

Thanks e'rrybody!

~ Danger!