Monday, September 21, 2015

A New Novel!

Here it is, kids. The cover to my new novel I WILL ROT WITHOUT YOU:

This bad boy is coming out in October and is available for pre-order RIGHT GODDAMN NOW from Fungasm Press

You got not only a new book from me to pick up, but you can also order books from John Skipp, Laura Lee Bahr, Cody Goodfellow, Violet LeVoit, Autumn Christian and Devora Gray. These are special editions that will come autographed by the author with your name PRINTED inside. 



Friday, September 18, 2015

An Interview and Two Upcoming Readings!

Short and sweet, here we go:

1. Did an interview with Christoph Paul on his excellent podcast The Passion of the Christoph.

LISTEN HERE or just download that shit from iTunes

2. October 1st doing a reading at The Lovecraft Bar in Portland, Oregon. This reading is the book release party of Garrett Cook's new novel A GOD OF HUNGRY WALLS as well as being the kick-off party for the H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival. Lots of excellent bizarro writers will be performing, including (but not limited to) me, Garrett, Jeff Burk and Vince Kramer. I've written something special for this performance and it's either going to be a lot of fun or fail miserably.

3. October 6th I'll be reading again at The Hour That Stretches at the Jade Lounge here in Portland. Last month the reading there went well. This month it should be even better, as my girlfriend Lisa LeStrange will be reading too and I think we're gonna perform our joint 'Interactive Erotic Friend Fiction' bit we did at the Bizarro Hour in Chicago. And I *might* perform the 'Popsicle' bit that won me 3rd place at last year's Bizarro Showdown.

Come on out and support me if you can. I love you.


Saturday, August 22, 2015

Upcoming Reading!

Hi there, my Dangerlings!

I got an upcoming reading on September 1st at the Jade Lounge in Portland, Oregon. The show is called The Hour That Stretches and will feature some new absurdist meta-fiction by me. And not only that, the one and only Garrett Cook will be reading there too! I'll even have some books with me for sale! It's gonna be a lot of fun! If you can come out, PLEASE DO.

For more details, stop being lazy and google that shit. Or click below for the Facebook event page:


That is all for now. Thanks, kids!

~ Danger!

Monday, July 13, 2015

A Flash Fiction/Interview! And Upcoming Appearances!

Hellllllllllo ladies! And also gentlemen. And also not-so-gentlemen.

Here's what's going on:

Had a piece of flash fiction and an interview that ran on Kevin Strange's blog as a part of his new series he's calling 'Flash Me Fiction'. Essentially, I wrote a piece of flash called JUNE, and then Kevin asked me a few questions based off of the story. In true form, I regard most of those question with completely asinine answers. Again, here's the links:


Next up, I've got two appearances scheduled.

The first is a reading at G-Mart Comics on August 1st in Chicago. It's part of the Bizarro Hour organized by Michael Allen Rose, and if you've ever seen any of their shows before, it promises to be a fun and funny time. We start at 8, so if you're in the area, COME ON BY!

Here is the Facebook event page for the Bizarro Hour with all relevant information.

And finally, you can catch me at the ScareLA convention in...well..Los Angels. That is August 8th and 9th. I'll be boozing and schmoozing and if you're there, come up say HI to me and make me feel like a big shot!

Here's the Facebook page for ScareLA.

Both these "appearances" are a part of a 2 week cross country trip I will be on as I relocate from New Jersey to Portland, OR. Hopefully, my tires will stay inflated and the cops will regard my out-of-state plates with kindness.

That's all that's new in my world. Things will probably be picking up around here soon. There's a new novel that is quickly coming down the pike (should be available through Fungasm Press in October) and I have a few readings/performances slated for when I get to Portland, but I'm not sure of the dates yet.

Later lovelies!


Monday, June 8, 2015

This is the Last Time I Call Jeremy Maddux a Punk-Ass Bitch!

My Dearest, Most Beautiful Readers,

The FINAL chapter in the epic six-month-long battle between Jeremy Maddux and I is up for your listening pleasure over at Surreal Sermons

IF you haven't paid any attention (and I know you haven't!) this is the episode for you. 7 or 8 phone calls later, the misunderstanding that spilled over into real life, involving our friends, lovers, and even our MOTHERS, finally comes to a close! Herein lie the beginning and the end, in chronological order, with color commentary from listeners who wanted to weigh in on the whole ordeal. 

If you loved me, you'd listen to this episode right now.


Your Best Friend, 


Sunday, April 26, 2015

Texas Frightmare Weekend!

People of the Internet,

Heading out tomorrow to Dallas, Texas for a few days of fun before Texas Frightmare Weekend (May 1- May 3). I'll be at the Rooster Republic Press/Strangehouse Books table, getting drunk and trying to sell some of my books, So if you're going to be in the Dallas area or happen to be going to the convention, let me know. I'll sign your books. We can hang out. I'll let you buy me a beer.


Saturday, February 14, 2015

Things That Have Happened!

Here's what's happened in the last month:

1. The very talented bizarro-Lothario Garrett Cook wrote a little article back in early January in which he said that I was an 'author to look out for in 2015.' Whether that's true or not, it was a very kind and unexpected gesture from him and it gave me the warm-fuzzies when I read it.


2. I also made another appearance on Jeremy Maddux's Surreal Sermons podcast, where we once again yell at each other. This Maddux dude has got a real bug up his butt. And now my real-life mother and best girl Lisa are involved too. I don't know what kinds of twists and turns this saga is going to take, but things are escalating quickly.


3. I also don't know if I made this announcement earlier, but it is official, so I suppose I should mention it: I (along with Kirk Jones) have been doing acquisitions/slush reading for Rooster Republic Press since last November. That means, if you want to pitch a book or send a manuscript to Rooster Republic, you can either talk to me, Kirk, or send it to the submissions email at

4. I HAVE FINISHED WRITING A NEW BOOK. A full-length novel, to be specific. There is no other news to report besides that, as I just finished writing it right before I made this blog update you are currently reading. But it is a HUGE relief and accomplishment whenever anything (especially lengthier things) are completed. So THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT to the three people in the world who actually support me. The rest of you can go ahead and DROWN YOURSELVES IN A SWIMMING POOL FULL OF DICKS!

As far as pimping goes, this time around I'm going to repay the favor and pimp my favorite Time Pimp:


He just released a new book HERE.

He also teaches a cheap online bizarro workshop which I hear (from the people who have taken it) is quite informative and interesting.

He also does professional editing for bizarro/horror/any type of book for, what in all actuality, is only a nominally small price.

This is the dude who's book beat my book for a Wonderland Award. So you know you're in good hands. If you are at all serious about writing and confused about where to begin or what to do, I highly suggest using Garrett's services. You won't be disappointed. If you are disappointed, well, then as I've already said, PLEASE RESUMING DROWNING YOURSELF IN THE AFOREMENTIONED SWIMMING POOL OF DICKS!

That is all for now.

~ Danger!